Sometimes it’s not the people who change; it’s the mask that falls off!

Frankie (my first and only boyfriend) and I have been together for a while now; living in absolute peace and harmony for two years without a minute of separation.

Naturally blessed with eyes for fine men, I carefully selected this well crafted specie of a man to suit my taste and satisfaction and my relatives couldn’t agree more; my little brother adored Frankie and forcefully gave him “The Hulk” as his moniker because he was almost built like one. His intimidating physical features complimented his amazing rich baritone voice which always sent cold shivers running down my spine.

I was raised by a single mother in the capital city of Ghana, Accra who only had me when she was eighteen (18). I’m now twenty-one (21) years of age but I’ve never experienced what it’s like to have a father so, I depended on Frankie’s love to totally fill up that vacuum to enable me feel whole again. My man, who is five years older than I am, has been busily servicing my mum for almost year and I had no clue. Naya, I wouldn’t have even found out if it wasn’t for the weird whatsapp chat between the two I discovered some months ago on Frankie’s phone which read, “Let’s do this again Mama. You tasted better than the last time -_^”… like seriously? Do what again Frankie, do what? I’m sure that was no eating they did in an open restaurant, I thought out loud! I was extremely heartbroken but decided not to confront them just yet. As if that was not enough, I later discovered other disturbing photos in my mother’s phone gallery (after quietly sneaking into my bedroom with it) which showed the two totally naked and in various disturbing sexual positions. Holy Christ! Looking at a photo of my mum with her gigantic boobs in the face of my boyfriend broke me down completely and I’m still in shock that I got my sanity still intact! My mother is a young cougar who chose to ruin the life of her only daughter by being a sex mate to my boyfriend, the man who took my virginity, how cruel!

I still haven’t gathered the courage to confront them Naya so all I do is to pretend that I know nothing of their dirty games. I watch them pretend before my eyes every day and it pisses me off when Frankie pretends to address my mum the usual shy and “son-in-law”.  I feel used, vulnerable and absolutely worthless Naya and I honestly do not know what to do. I’m extremely in love with Frankie”

From Facebook user Erica (actual name withheld)

Hi Erica,

I find your letter very disturbing and I’m honestly saddened by your predicament. To be betrayed by the woman who gave you life and the first man to pop your cherry is really something.

You have daddy issues and its only normal to want to feel loved, needed and have a sense of belonging but you’re doing it the wrong way. You don’t need a man to make you feel loved and appreciated; your validation lies in the hands of no one but yourself. Pray to God, get closer to him and give him that emptiness you feel inside of you and He’ll fill you up.

I’d however encourage you to make your boyfriend and mother know that you’re already aware of what’s going on to just set yourself free! No matter how much it’s going to hurt, I think it’s only logic to let Frankie go sweetie, he’s not good for you! Yes he took your virginity so you feel stuck with him and under an illusion that you’re still in love with him! But honey he gave you your first sex experience and it’s normal to think that you still feel that way about him…A man who can be this bold to cheat on you with your own Mother is POISONOUS and no good for your health! CUT HIM OFF! HE DOESN’T LOVE NOR CARE ABOUT YOU! After you make them aware that you’re already in the know, bring yourself to forgive your mother because she’s family and it’ll be almost impossible to cut her off. deep down you also know how much you still love her so don’t allow this intruder ruin what you have built for 21 years with your mother; give yourself time to heal before you take the next step. If they want to keep up with their act after you break up then just let them be. You deserve better than a man who’s nothing better than a hungry dog! Your delusion of who Frankie was has only been shattered by the truth of who he really is. Now that you know what mummy is capable of doing, just take some safety precautions in your next relationship since you two now have the same taste in men!(just saying)  Stay strong! Do keep in touch and I’d be glad to help you through this.


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